Booty and the Beard

Ryan and Steffie come back from their trip a very rural place for a wedding. They discuss the country town from their “big city” perspective. Farms turned into Zombie Farms and they discuss the toddler’s knowledge of food production and child-based marketing.

The conversation shifts to entertaining kids’ shows but an unfortunate mistake turns Ryan and Steffie into cyborgs. They talk about Data from Star Trek and his less famous cousin, Beta.

They discuss Pacman’s 30th anniversary and the effect of the Pacman Google entry on the economy. Ryan somehow finds a way to blame Obama and then does the wrong impression. Speaking of blaming Obama, Steffie and Ryan discuss the oil slowly filling up the Gulf of Mexico and its relation to the Pirates of Dark Water.

Ryan has a hard-on for Shia Lebeouf this episode and discusses several movies he’s in and how he mixes them in his mind. Steffie and Ryan discuss the unfortunately named Teabaggers. Ryan and Steffie vow to use whatever name they choose for themselves next to make a new sexual act so they will continue to live in shame.

Ryan and Steffie have their first ever “segment” which is yet to be named. Steffie gives Ryan the headline and Ryan has to fill in the details. Peter the Moose is the star and a die-hard, sap-slinging, crime-lord. He may or may not be controlled by either Transformers or the Eagle Eye chick.

Steffie’s fear of horses is brought to the table which leads to conversations about Tyra Bank’s fear of dolphins and dolphins in general. Steffie understands the fear and Ryan thinks they shouldn’t neglect our aquatic allies. They bring up dolphin-related crimes. Ryan believes rape is extremely common among animals.

“I’m tired of being drill-pressed by these taxes!”-Ryan

“Dudley Do Right was fucked up!”-Steffie

Intro Song: N.D. Monroe – Traffic Jam Dreams

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